About TA
What is Transactional Analysis (TA)
Transactional Analysis (TA) is a comprehensive psychological framework that helps us understand who we are internally and how we relate to others externally. Developed by Dr. Eric Berne in the 1950s, TA introduces the concept of three distinct ego states—Parent, Adult, and Child (PAC)—which form the core of our personality and influence how we think, feel, and behave. By examining these ego states and how they interact, TA blends insights from psychoanalysis, developmental psychology, and communication theory to provide a clear map of human behaviour. It helps individuals recognise unconscious patterns, improve communication, and make conscious changes—leading to greater autonomy, intimacy, and personal fulfillment.
It’s unique because it uses accessible language while offering deep psychological insight. It empowers individuals to take responsibility for their choices and shift from passive, reactive behaviour to conscious, purposeful action. At the heart of TA is the belief that people can change, grow, and reauthor their personal narratives.
The Ego State Model: Parent, Adult, Child
One of TA’s foundational concepts is the Ego State Model, which categorises our internal experience into three parts:
– Parent: Internalised rules, values, and behaviours learned from authority figures.
– Adult: The rational, here-and-now part of the self that processes information objectively.
– Child: The emotional, intuitive, and playful self rooted in early experiences.
Ref for image – https://insightfulcounselling.com/therapy/transactional-analysis-therapy
By identifying which ego state we’re operating from, we gain insight into our reactions and learn to shift towards healthier communication. For example, a conflict may trigger our Critical Parent or Vulnerable Child—TA helps us return to our Adult state to respond with clarity and compassion.
One of TA’s foundational concepts is the Ego State Model, which categorises our internal experience into three parts:
– Parent: Internalised rules, values, and behaviours learned from authority figures.
– Adult: The rational, here-and-now part of the self that processes information objectively.
– Child: The emotional, intuitive, and playful self rooted in early experiences.
By identifying which ego state we’re operating from, we gain insight into our reactions and learn to shift towards healthier communication. For example, a conflict may trigger our Critical Parent or Vulnerable Child—TA helps us return to our Adult state to respond with clarity and compassion.
Life Scripts and Early Decisions
As children, we make unconscious decisions about ourselves, others, and life based on early experiences. These become part of our life script—the story we tell ourselves about who we are and how life will unfold. These decisions are often influenced by early messages or injunctions such as “Don’t succeed,” “Don’t feel,” or “Don’t belong.”
Video Link – https://youtu.be/mavlfhH-HOU
These scripts guide our behaviours, thinking, feelings, and beliefs well into adulthood, often limiting our potential. TA helps individuals identify, understand, and rewrite these outdated narratives so they can live more freely and intentionally.
Life Positions
In TA, Life Positions are the core beliefs we hold about ourselves and others, often formed in early childhood. These unconscious positions shape how we relate and communicate.
The four basic life positions are:
- I’m OK – You’re OK: The healthiest position, reflecting mutual respect and emotional balance.
- I’m OK – You’re not OK: A defensive stance, often leading to blaming or controlling behaviour.
- I’m not OK – You’re OK: Rooted in low self-esteem and self-doubt.
- I’m not OK – You’re not OK: A position of despair or hopelessness.
TA aims to help individuals move toward the empowering ‘I’m OK – You’re OK’ position to foster autonomy and healthier relationships.
Ref for Image – Stewart, I., & Joines, V. (1987), Pg 120
In TA, Life Positions are the core beliefs we hold about ourselves and others, often formed in early childhood. These unconscious positions shape how we relate and communicate.
The four basic life positions are:
- I’m OK – You’re OK: The healthiest position, reflecting mutual respect and emotional balance.
- I’m OK – You’re not OK: A defensive stance, often leading to blaming or controlling behaviour.
- I’m not OK – You’re OK: Rooted in low self-esteem and self-doubt.
- I’m not OK – You’re not OK: A position of despair or hopelessness.
TA aims to help individuals move toward the empowering ‘I’m OK – You’re OK’ position to foster autonomy and healthier relationships.
Transactions
A transaction is a basic unit of communication in Transactional Analysis—each time we speak, gesture, or respond, we’re making a transaction between ego states (Parent, Adult, or Child).
There are three key types of transactions:
Complementary Transactions: These occur when the response comes from the ego state the stimulus was aimed at—for example, Adult to Adult. They are smooth and effective, supporting healthy communication.
Crossed Transactions
These happen when the response comes from an unexpected ego state, leading to miscommunication or conflict—such as an Adult speaking to an Adult, but receiving a Child-like response.
These happen when the response comes from an unexpected ego state, leading to miscommunication or conflict—such as an Adult speaking to an Adult, but receiving a Child-like response.
Ulterior Transactions
These involve two levels of communication—one overt (spoken) and one covert (hidden). For example, a joke with a hidden criticism. They often lead to psychological games.
Understanding these dynamics helps us become more aware of how we interact—and gives us tools to communicate with clarity and respect.
Games People Play
Psychological games are repetitive, often unconscious patterns of interaction that typically end in negative or uncomfortable feelings for one or both people involved. First introduced by Dr. Eric Berne in his landmark book Games People Play (1964), these games are subtle, scripted, and often predictable in outcome. They are played out between people’s ego states—Parent, Adult, and Child—and are driven by hidden motives, unresolved emotional needs, and life scripts formed early in life. Though they may appear harmless or habitual on the surface, psychological games often serve to reinforce limiting beliefs and emotional pain, keeping individuals stuck in unproductive relational patterns.
Payoff Examples include:
– “Yes, but…”
– “If it weren’t for you…”
– “See what you made me do”
A game goes through 6 steps.
Although these patterns can feel familiar, they are ultimately unproductive and damaging to relationships. Transactional Analysis helps us become aware of these dynamics and teaches us how to step out of repetitive, scripted interactions. By recognising the payoff behind the game and choosing Adult-to-Adult communication, we move toward healthier, more authentic relationships. As Berne emphasised, real freedom comes when we stop playing games and start relating openly and honestly.
According to James, 1973, you may ask a series of questions to yourself and get answers to the game you may be playing and the payoff you get from the same.
- What keeps happening over and over again?
- How does it start?
- What happens next?
- And then what happens?
- How does it end?
- How do you feel after it ends?
To learn more on what games you may be playing in your everyday life and how it may impact you do read the book – “Games People Play” by Eric Berne